Hello ta tha Known Grifters! 'Cap's here to give you some words of wisdom, so sit down, and shut up! I'm going to tell you about my new favorite game, Red Dead Redemption! Ever since I was just a little boy, I've dreamed of being a cowboy in the Wild West. I even started wearing my cowboy costume around town. Into my teens I wore it! I had to stop after some close encounters with strangers in vans that I'd like to forget, but I'll say this- it's true what they say, strangers really do have the best candy, and the smoothest balls! They say that, right?
Anyways, Red Dead Redemption! The game takes place in the Wild West which is what, the 1700's, right? Anyways, it must be a really long time ago, since I don't recognize any of the names of places, 'cept Mexico, which is nice because it's before all the illegals came over here and took our god damn jobs! What's weird is I didn't see any Indians, but maybe they were already extinct by then...shame, since I really wanted to meet that Ghandi fella. Maybe they all when back to Indiana? And where the hell was John Wayne?! All I wanted was to ride next to Old Blue Eyes, while he sang a jaunty tune on the way to put a stop to the dastardly plans of Snidely Whiplash and his partner, Natasha.
|Take your top off!|
Why does he always wear that mask?